Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
