the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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