looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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