He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize