I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
