He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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