He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
that is very illegal...i love you.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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