Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
