Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
