Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
