Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
