the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
