Betty ford says i'm here all night
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
