I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
