He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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