he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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