capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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