You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
