We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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