There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
