Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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