$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
