what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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