How'd it feel making her break her religion?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
