Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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