Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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