The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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