after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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