haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
