And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
