we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
