i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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