Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
