Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
