dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
