All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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