Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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