Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
