What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
no you cant smoke seaweed
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
