i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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