It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
