I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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