I just threw up on my dentist
that's an acceptable place to lick
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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