you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
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