So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
