i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
