My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
