where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
