seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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