I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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