So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
