Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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